There is nothing more joyful than news of a pregnancy. It is a testament to the miracle of life and the resilience and strength of a woman. But the truth is, pregnancy can be overwhelming, and it is normal for her to feel anxious and vulnerable during this life-changing chapter in her life.
A mom-to-be’s birthing partner plays a crucial role in ensuring she feels supported all throughout her pregnancy and most especially during labor and delivery. Ma. Cristina M. Maledeo-Miravalles, MD, an Obstetrics & Gynecology Consultant at Makati Medical Center (MakatiMed), emphasizes that while the spouse is the usual pick for a birth partner, the mom can also choose a parent, a relative, or even a close friend.
Whoever mom appoints to be her birth partner, the person should be able to ease her burdens by being present and proactive in every stage of the entire pregnancy. MakatiMed shares important pointers for every birthing partner:
1. Prepare ahead
Preparation is key for a successful and stress-free childbirth. For Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles, the birthing partner should be able to attend all, if not most, prenatal check-ups to understand the physiological changes brought by pregnancy and how it impacts overall health of the mother.
“Prenatal checkups are important to detect pregnancy issues which might complicate the pregnancy and educate the women on dangers and signs of emergency. This is also to prepare the woman and her birthing partner prior to the delivery,” says Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles.
Birth partners are also encouraged to attend birthing classes to learn about the stages of labor, familiarize themselves with the different parts of the hospital including the delivery room, prepare the hospital bag as well as all the other things needed for the childbirth such as the caregiver for the mom’s older kids if any, cash and credit cards, camera, and documents like the admitting orders from the doctor, lab results, insurance or HMO guarantee letters, as well as applicable government forms.
They’re also expected to actively participate in putting together the mom’s birth plan, a written outline of what the mom would like to happen during labor (anesthesia options) and delivery (either vaginal that could include water birth setup or a C-section). The plan serves as a guide to her requested baby care plan that includes cord blood banking, feeding options, and circumcision.
“Do the birth plan with your wife. Don’t just wait for your wife to share her wishes. Don’t delegate it to her. Be proactive,” reminds Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles.
2. Offer emotional support
A good birthing partner doesn’t only provide a mom-to-be practical assistance with the logistics of labor and delivery, they’re also the first one she leans on for comfort, moral support, and emotional support. Pregnancy can be an emotional journey for a woman, and her birth partner should be able to provide companionship and motivation to get through the nine months and prepare for motherhood.
During labor, Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles suggests birth partners to learn breathing exercises as well as massage and calming techniques to ease intense contractions. They could also help the mom pass time during the early stages of labor by playing relaxing music or watching films.
“Help your partner stay motivated. Offer words of encouragement. Tell her how much you love her and care about her or how well she’s doing. Respect her if she wishes to keep quiet because she might need to focus,” adds Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles.
The birth partner is expected to be the mom’s advocate and should be able to clearly communicate with the medical staff about what she needs and her decisions during labor and delivery. Presence of mind and flexibility are crucial for a birth partner. Even with a well-defined birth plan, they must be ready to make quick decisions in case of a medical emergency.
3. Take care of yourself, too
Given all the tasks, it’s essential for a birth partner to stay healthy and well, especially during labor and delivery.
“Be on your top form to support and provide comfort for a pregnant woman. Why? Labor may take a long, long time, as long as 24 hours or more,” shares Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles.
Birth partners are encouraged to take toilet breaks whenever needed and eat their meals on time. They should also bring their comfortable clothes and even self-care items to help them stay focused and energized to provide sustained support throughout the process. By taking care of themselves, birth partners can also unburden a woman in labor from the worry of their partner’s well-being.
“Don’t bring your work during the labor,” Dr. Maledeo-Miravalles quips, emphasizing the importance of a birth partner’s undivided attention and the need to avoid other forms of additional stress.
Ultimately, a good birth partner is someone who is fully present, responsive to the mom’s needs, and committed to offering consistent physical, emotional, and practical assistance throughout the entire experience. By prioritizing the mother’s care, the birth partner is also contributing to a safe and healthy start to the baby’s life.
Article based on the Pregnancy & Beyond episode with Ma. Cristina M. Maledeo-Miravalles, MD last July 20, 2024.
For the complete list of Makati Medical Center’s Obstetrician & Gynecologists, click here. You may also reach us via MakatiMed On-Call at (+632) 8888 8999 or at [email protected].
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